Lisa Simpson once said “This is why I can’t have nice things!”
And sadly I feel sometimes that neither can I. Let me explain. Our autistic son Tom has major sensory issues, and he feels the need to chew on, fiddle with, eat non food items. Especially my items. Why is mummies stuff seems so much more attractive for destruction than any other thing in the house. Why?!
Last week I got a Pandora bracelet (yes I know – Yay!) and even with the excitement of having something so nice a part of me said, Tom is going to stuff this on me the second I let my guard down. Today that prophecy proved true. I took the bracelet off to have a shower and sat it on the sink. Tom comes meandering in, as the kids do when I need to do anything alone, and I didn’t see him scoop up the bracelet through the steamed up shower door. I get out to find him chewing on it and beads scattered everywhere. The little sod. I was really upset, not for the bracelet, but for the sense of normalcy we can’t have. I should be able to do that. I should be able to sit something down and come back and find it still there, not in chewed up little pieces or not find it all. I often find myself longing for the times when we could have soap on the sink without it being eaten, and not have to put everything up at a height of six feet (and climbing as he gets taller). I find myself looking at things in shops and thinking that’s nice, but what’s the point in getting/having it as it will just be destroyed in no time by the madness that is Autism. Good for the budget I suppose. I often find myself getting jealous of being ‘normal’ – most days I can handle it, our not so normal household, but on days like today… well you get the picture, it get’s to you sometimes.
Anyway I have to share what my husband did, well-tried to do, to set things right. He knew that I was really upset and set about finding the missing beads. After ransacking the bathroom we were still missing a bead, and Pandora beads aren’t cheap. So he decided to pull the traps out of the sink and the floor drain to check them, and oh the smell, but no luck there. So then he went through the bin. Did I mention that he has a big dose of ‘man flu’ right now, so this can’t have been easy for him to do. But he did.
You know they love you when they rake through a stinking drain with their bare hands, and bin full of nappies and god knows what else for you. That’s love.
We still didn’t find the last bead.